Journal #2

Well... 17 days :)

Feels like it was just 2 days ago that I was sitting in my room counting the days and it was 200 and some days. Time is flyyying!

I went shopping with my dad, mom, and sister, Sarah, earlier this week. Before we left Columbus we went into this Christian bookstore and this song called "You are More" was playing. I made a note in my phone to make sure I downloaded the song as soon as I got home cuz I absolutely LOVED the song. So here's the video for the song- you need to watch it. It's amazing- 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwtcwQwgdsA

The first time I watched this video I just sat there crying. The song is so touching. And I really feel like it could easily explain my life to a T. So many times I've found myself asking "How did I get here? I'm not who I once was." And then I'd try to do better, I knew all the answers- but then I'd be too weak to try. I listened to the lie that people don't change. I believed that all that mattered was what I'd done, where I'd been, and the terrible shame I felt. I was honestly crippled by fear. Fear to really try to change. But then the unfailing love of my God would surround me and remind me of all the things He'd done for me. And I'd realize that I am more than just the choices I make, more than my past mistakes, more than the problems I've created. I've been remade. And can I even begin to try to explain the joy that would fill my heart? The peace that would surround me when I realized that it was not about what I'd done- but what Jesus had done for me. That it wasn't about where I'd been- but about where my brokenness had brought me. It wasn't about the shame I felt- it's about the love that Jesus felt to forgive me. It was about what Jesus felt to make me feel LOVED. And let me tell you- being loved by Jesus is enough to make me forget my past and push forward to a better future :)

So yeah- this isn't really about my trip to Africa- but it's something I'll carry with me to Africa :) If you ever feel alone, broken, shameful, hopeless- don't. Don't believe it when you hear it said that people can't change. People can and people DO change. You've been remade. And you never have to go back to who you used to be.

"Though our hearts are filled with sins, you forgive them all” (Psalm 65:3). 
"...It is testimony to the strength of love, the power of faith, and the truth that people can change."
-George W. Bush ♥ (LOVE him!!!)


xoxoxo :) Bethany Diane Joy

Ps: I’m currently eating salt & vinegar chips- I’m really gonna miss these things while I’m in Africa :(

First Blog :)

In 36 days my plane will be landing in UGANDA. 
Which is in AFRICA. 
Which means that I, Bethany Parks, will be in UGANDA, AFRICA. 
Which means my dream is REALLY coming true :) 
Ever since I was little I dreamed of coming to Africa. 
Crazy how dreams actually do come true :)

I've never blogged before so I'm not completely sure what to write- but I'm going to do my best to update this blog while I'm gone. I've always been huge into journaling, but as all my family & best friends know, I NEVER let anyone touch, let alone read, my journals. It's something really personal to me and is a huge stress reliever. Buuuttt- I'm going to be across the world from the people I love the most for 4 months so I figured the least I could do was maybe open up those journals for them. So that's what my blogging will mostly be. Personal journals. Updates on life. Notes to the people I love most. That sorta thing :) I'm excited.
 
So I guess I'll start my first blog with complete honesty- I am SCARED. It's terrifying to think of being sooo far away from my family for so long. I've always been so close to my family- they've always been one phone call away- 1 mile away- haha never a 23 hour plane ride away. So it's definitely a huge change. 
But I am soooo EXCITED. I need this trip. I need to get away from the little safe city of Mount Vernon. That little city holds nearly every single memory of my life- I think it's time to step out of my comfort zone and experience something new. There's so much in my life that I'm ready to leave behind. And I think this trip is exactly what I need to make that happen.

Back in September I got a tattoo :) Not many people know about it, but on my left rib cage I have the scripture, "So, with Him on my side I am fearless, afraid of no one and nothing. Psalm 27:1" I loooove this. I never really thought I'd get a tattoo- but this scripture has always been such an encouragement to me in my life. I've had a lot of ups and downs, I've faced failure, rejection, hurt, betrayal, disappointment, and I've felt hopeless a lot, but this scripture has always had a way of showing up in times like those. It's just a reminder to me that as long as I trust Jesus and believe, He is going to be RIGHT there. Right by my side. And when I realize I have Him right by my side, I begin to feel fearless. And it's a beautiful feeling :) This scripture has really helped me prepare for Africa. Like I said earlier, I get so scared thinking about leaving- but every time I look at my side I remember that I have NOTHING to be afraid of :) Jesus is right on my side. I've got nothing to be afraid of. He's not going anywhere. No matter where I go- He's right there with me. The Jesus that's protecting me here in Mount Vernon is the exact same Jesus that is going to protect me while I'm in Uganda. I can't help but smile when I remember that :)

Okay I think I'm done with my first blog :)
I love you all soooo much <3
Keep me in your prayers- I promise you're all in mine :)


xoxoxo, Bethany Diane Joy